In part 3, I’ll describe our current treatment plan, using diet and supplements and avoiding prescription medication.  Please note, this is our story.  Do not suddenly stop any prescribed medications or therapies based on an internet blog post!

I had been searching for answers for Mr. R  for years. Through lots of research, I settled on a plan. At first, I banned sugar. Turns out the real problem was the fake food dyes that sugary kid treats contained. Now he can eat sugar – as long as it’s in something natural.

Now, his diet is no artificial food dyes (Red #40, Yellow #5, Blue Lake, etc.). No MSG. No petroleum based preservatives (BHT/BHA/TBHQ). They put those things in the bag that keeps cereal fresh! Should we really eat these?

No artificial sweeteners. I use Equal to kill fire ant mounds in my yard. Again, can this possibly be healthy? I’ve got a ton of links, and books, that helped me come to this conclusion – you are what you eat, and what you don’t eat.  You’ve probably noticed my interest in “real food”.

(Side effects of food additives)

(Links to studies on apartame)

(Links to studies on MSG)

(More on MSG)

(Anecdotal evidence, plus recipes and resources)

(The Straight Dope on MSG) (this is like Snopes.com)

(Studies on BHA/BHT/TBHQ)

Next, I treated him for a condition known as Pyroluria. It’s standard to treat BP people in the Netherlands for this, but in America, big Pharma can’t make money off it so there aren’t many studies and it’s considered “alternative”.  I’m down on the pharmaceutical industry and the FDA, and my skepticism about government groups and lobbying organization grows everyday.

Pyroluria is a vitamin deficiency – like scurvy or rickets. Specifically, it is a B vitamin deficiency, and usually zinc too (B vitamins and zinc are linked in their metabolizing process). Often, there is a copper toxicity. Too much copper displaces the zinc. There is a simple urine test for this, but it costs $70-$100 and I haven’t had it done.  In one study, interestingly, almost 7o% of schizophrenic patients, and 80% of alcoholics were diagnosed with pyroluria, and their symptoms improved once they started taking the correct vitamins.  Alcoholism and bipolar are well known to be co-morbid, that is, appearing together, and the current theory is that many bipolar people use alcohol to self medicate.

(Pyroluria)

(Treatment history and results)

(Natural treatments for pyroluria)

We also supplement with omega-3 fatty acids. Even American studies have shown that in addition to heart health, these important nutrients increase focus, help alleviate depression, and stabilize mood.

Sometimes I throw in some acidophilus – yeah, the stuff in yogurt that you take so you don’t get a yeast infection – to cure his burpy/fart problem.   Now that he’s been more or less off the stuff he reacts to, we don’t need it so much.

Now, the kid, as I mentioned, would probably die before swallowing a pill, so I searched high and low and found chewables without food dyes in them for the B vitamins and Zinc, and he takes Coromega, which is like a spoonful of orange pudding in a little packet. Acidophilus is naturally chewable.

We also have added the supplements of inositol and choline, which help with mood stability, anxiety, and just seem to help him have a more even keel.

That’s the story of our journey into, and out of psych meds.

We are successfully treating bipolar disorder through nutrition. Mr R can read at grade level now, and is in a mainstream classroom.  He loves school and gets good reports and progress reports. He knows many sounds for A - apple, father, ate, and the silent one – read (past tense). He is teaching himself cursive (so he can read my notes to his teacher, I suspect!) and also teaching himself to draw from books and online tutorials.

He’s a regular kid again! Thanks be to God.

Books that helped tremendously:

Head

The Explosive Child, by Dr. Ross Greene

The Myth of the ADD Child:50 Ways to Improve Your Child’s Behavior and Attention Span Without Drugs, Labels, or Coercion, by Thomas Armstrong

The New Strong Willed Child, Dr. James Dobson (didn’t help with dear son, but sure did for brother #2 and sister #3!);

The Difficult Child, by Dr. Stanley Turecki

Transforming the Difficult Child, The Nurtured Heart Approach by Howard Glasser I was truly desperate to try this approach, but something had to give. I thought it was a miracle short term, we used it for 3 months when I was home alone and husband was out of state. It helped us “reset” our expectations, and our other discipline works very well now

Heart

No Greater Love, by Mother Teresa

The Imitation of Christ, by Thomas A Kempis

Food and Diet

Why Your Child Is Hyperactive, by Dr. Ben Feingold

The Joy of Cooking, by Irma Rombauer. The old one, not the new 2006 one. The new one uses things like cream of mushroom soup – can’t do that if you’re avoiding MSG! The old one tells you how to make everything from scratch. I got mine new in 1997.

Eating Well for Optimum Health, Dr. Andrew

Linking up!

Bipolar Kid: Our Family’s Tale part 3 originally appeared on Mama Says on August 11, 2010. If you see this posted on any other site, please let me know! Leave me a comment on www.milehimama.com

In part 1, I shared with you with stories of my rocky parenting of our firstborn, Mr R.  We finally got a diagnosis of bipolar for him.  Here’s how we coped immediately after the diagnosis.

Also at age 7, he began attending a small private school with his brother. He was in a mixed Kindergarten/first grade classroom. His brother, a newly minted 6 year old, was in Kindergarten – and my son was placed there as well. Brother made progress – his teacher called him a model student. My BP son would have failed Kindergarten, except I withdrew him early because of a lot of complicated politics at the church. He was there on scholarship – my family has been associated with that church for quite a while, and although I didn’t attend the parish, my brother, landlord, and several friends did. I cleaned the school twice a month and volunteered as part of tuition, as well. My son’s first grade teacher, in her sixties and truly a gifted educator, agreed with me that something was seriously wrong.

Before he started school that year, I took him to our priest for a special blessing. Not quite a full exorcism, which requires an investigation and the approval of the bishop, but one step down from that. I really do think I explored every option. (well, I didn’t do past life regression. I said I’m a quack, not stupid and crazy.) I read all manner of books, prayed, slipped Scripture verses under his pillow. Husband annointed the house with oil and rebuked Satan. (He’s a Baptist turned non-denominational).

I had him tested by the local school district, who gave him the ironic label of “Significantly Identifiable Emotional Disability”. I say ironic, because they did not identify the emotional disability, just called him SIED.  But he did qualify for services, which, in that rural district and through the private school, was going to consist of twice weekly sessions with a social worker to work on self esteem issues.

I declined, and was then accused of child abuse. It seems that putting dear son in the shower to help snap him out of his 6 hour rages is abusive. I thought not giving your child a bath was abusive, but I guess I’m not a trained social worker. A child voluntarily taking a bath is ok. Making them do it is not. Go figure. I think it’s because the school district, one ofthe less affluent, wasn’t going to get their federal funds for my son unless they provided some sort of service for him, and they were trying to pressure me. Ha! I am not easily pressured, swayed, or influenced. I believe I am what people call mule-headed.

Anyway, throughout all of this, I was working 2 jobs, then 1 job, had a baby, and spent several months with my husband working out of state to support us. Still seeking treatment through the medical establishment. Finally getting a diagnosis.

My husband and I made the decision to put dear son, age 7, on antipsychotic medication. A dangerous proposition, especially as this was an off-label use (that medication has since been approved for use in autistic children.) However, bipolar disorder has a 15% fatality rate (from suicide), not counting shortened lifespans from alcohol abuse, drug abuse, and risk taking behaviors, which BP’s do at an astronomical rate. He had already talked about killing himself, and we ended up having to lock the knives up for a while, with the food, since I kept finding them in his room. Remember, this kid was a scrawny 7 year old, not a troubled teen!

A few weeks went by. Dear son, always the special one, will not take medicine or pills. He’s also the biggest wimp. So, we figured out how to put the pills in a spoonful of applesauce – sometimes several spoonfuls – and tweaked the dose and the timing. The medication made him more normal. Able to stop himself before he got mad-but when he got mad, it was all over. Could be 4-6 hours before he was coherent again, another 2-3 before he was a little boy again. He had those rages several times a week. He is about 18 months to 2 years behind in emotional development, plays better with 6 year olds than 8 or 9 year olds, and I think a large part of this is the time he missed when he was raging. He would rarely remember anything that happened, would express surprise at broken toys, would ask me what happened to the wall… he literally had 15-20 hours a week of his entire life missing.

The medication gave our family a break. It allowed my spirit, as well as his, to heal. I had a heart for my son again. I had been praying for years – literally – to love him the way I do now. So much damage is done, however, when I would spend hours holding him in the basket weave hold while he thrashed and spit and bit and said all manner of nasty things.

Everything was on hold all of the time because of him.  Meals were destroyed, siblings caught in the crossfire, and many trips were not taken. Family relationships were affected as many thought I was too easy, should spank him more, needed to crack down, needed to be consistent. Even though my other children were turning out pretty good. Others in my family thought I needed to lighten up, relax, give the kid a break. I couldn’t win for losing. My dear son also developed quite and acrimonious relationship with his grandmother.

The meds helped us heal, and allowed us to get on with our lives. I took dear son out of school in April. He turned 8, I quit my job and was home with him, again trying the homeschooling to catch him up. Husband went out of state for 7 weeks, we moved across the country, and dear son started in a wonderful special education program at the public school. His class has 5 students, 2 adults (teacher and assistant), and is designed specifically for children who are behind grade level due to emotional/mood problems. It is truly a godsend!

The medication sabbatical, and a training system detailed in “Transforming the Difficult Child: The Nurtured Heart Approach“, really helped us get our feet back under us. The credit system from the book has since been dropped, but it allowed him to see he could do better. It allowed me to replace my mental image of him, to see he could do well, even excel, be normal, have a conversation. It was exactly what we needed. However, I wasn’t comfortable giving him this medication for life. There are serious side effects, including heart disease, high cholesterol, and long term use can cause diabetes. I kept looking for a better way.

Bipolar Kid: Our Family’s Tale part 2 originally appeared on Mama Says on August 2, 2010. If you see this posted on any other site, please let me know! Leave me a comment on www.milehimama.com

I am a quack.  Or, I would be if I had a medical license.  This is the story of how my son was diagnosed with a mental disorder and has found healing in diet and supplements and family life.  He’s not cured, but he is better.

This post has been percolating for a while, but I’m finally going to post it in the hopes that it will help someone else. I’ll be including links, so you can read and evaluate for yourself. Remember, use your critical thinking skills and to note the source! Is it an independent study, a nutritional supplement trying to sell vitamins, a pharmaceutical website hoping you don’t take vitamins? Some of the studies are very clinical and quite dry reading… take them in small doses!

My son was diagnosed with early-onset bipolar disorder (used to be called Manic Depression). He was on a prescription antipsychotic for 6 months. Now, his illness is managed solely by nutrition and supplements. Here’s the story.

He has been off medication since November, 2006.

(Bipolar disorder – wikipedia)

(Bipolar disorder in children)

(Nutrition and biplar disorder)

I knew something was different about Mr R, but I didn’t know what.  I can recall asking advice at my husband’s bible study once and the ladies did a very charismatic prayer intervention, and Mr R was only two years old at that point.

I am the second oldest of eight children, the youngest of whom was born when I was in high school. I worked my way through high school babysitting, and taking nanny jobs in the summer. The church I attended was full of large families. My dear son acted like no child I’ve ever seen. Except maybe Linda Blair, when he was really mad. It was not that he was high spirited (he is), strong willed (he is), very creative (yep), with poor impulse control (pre-pubescent boy, what do you expect?). It was way more than that. It was not something that could be cured by a good thrashing, more discipline, or relaxing the rules. It was not a rebellion against authority, or a passing bad attitude. My other children were completely different, and normal parenting things worked with them. Not dear son.

At age 4, I decided there was NO WAY the kid would make it in a public school. There was also no way we could afford to put him in a private school. So I attempted to homeschool him. We started with “This is A. It says /a/.”

When he was 5, we removed all of the furniture and the light fixture from his room for safety reasons.

When he was 6, we removed the bed as well. He would sleep underneath it because he liked the closed in spaces and was terrified of his closet.   And the rages.  These were not tantrums, but total and complete meltdowns of anything rational in his brain.  Property was damaged, sometimes people were, and always hearts were.  Often, he would not remember raging.  He blocked them out.

Our son would lose his mind over… anything.  Maybe he didn’t get his way.  Maybe there was a thunderstorm.  Maybe his routine was disrupted, or maybe he was bored with the same old same old.  And when he lost it, he was gone.  Thrashing, kicking, screaming, gouging.  Once I had taken him grocery shopping, hoping to make it a special time for us.  I had to leave in the middle of the store, literally drag him to the car, and stop several times on the way home as he kept taking off his seatbelt and throwing things at me – his shoes, books, anything he could reach.

Other times he was just grumpy, and it was better to not even talk to him.  Those days I just let him watch as much Discovery Channel as he wanted.  He adored animals, loved Steve Irwin, and even at the age of 2 and 3 could name animals and dinosaurs with specificity (even though he couldn’t remember to go to the bathroom or what his name looked like.) He watched Nova and Scooby Doo gave him nightmares.  I had to take a very strict line with him regarding fantasy because he wasn’t learning to tell the difference from reality.  I felt backed up by Montessori principles and I think maybe I was too Luddite in that regard with the other children.

He still didn’t get that A made the /a/ sound, after two intense years of coloring pages and collages and flashcards and letter theme days and “Teach Your Child to Read in 100 Easy Lessons”.

This was a big lesson God taught me. I learned to read when I was 4, and thought that children who couldn’t read by kindergarten had lazy moms. How I could ever have been that judgemental, I’ll never know. But I was a snob in that department.

By the time he was 7, life was so difficult on so many levels with him that I finally sought professional treatment.  In this case, it was for an eating disorder – his eating disorder. He would eat everything in the house (raw spaghetti noodles, too). Then, he would say he was so fat he wanted to die. A 7 year old boy?  Are you kidding me?

He told me if he saw a car driving down the road, he would jump in front of it so it would squish him. Then he wouldn’t have to be fat. The child was small for his age, and you could count his ribs if he did a backbend. We put grates on his windows so he couldn’t climb out or break them. We had padlocks on the pantries and a bicycle chain on the fridge.

Turns out he didn’t have an eating disorder.

He has Bipolar disorder (BP). I was glad to finally get his diagnosis, since I had come to that conclusion independently based on my own research.

To Be Continued…

(If you’re here from Saturday Evening Blog post, will you take a moment to read this important post about Sears?  I am trying to get 1000 customers to tell Sears to dump the porn, so if that is important to you please leave a comment!)

Linking up!

Bipolar Kid: Our Family’s Tale part 1 originally appeared on Mama Says on July 28, 2010. If you see this posted on any other site, please let me know! Leave me a comment on www.milehimama.com

My baby sleeps, head resting on my chest, pillowed on my soft body.  Ah, this is why I am soft.  So my baby will sleep, tucked in the nook of my arm.  Her fine, fine hair calls to me for kisses, a thousand nuzzly kisses for my fine, fine baby.

My Baby Sleeps originally appeared on Mama Says on July 12, 2010. If you see this posted on any other site, please let me know! Leave me a comment on www.milehimama.com

Yesterday, I did something I’ve never done before.  I allowed my 12 year old and 11 year old to stay home, alone, while I ran to the bank .  I packed everyone else up and took them with me, but SQUEE!  The days when they can mind the baby for me are coming ever closer!  Yee-haw!

We went over the rules, I emphasized which movies they couldn’t watch, told them they could not unlock the door under any circumstances, alerted husband dear to my plan, and made sure they wrote down my cell phone number in two different places.

All went well.  Except for the Neighbor Boys, who, because my boys were required to leave the door locked, sat on the porch.  And my boys cracked the door open with the chain lock still in place so they could talk through the door until I got back.  Sigh.

We’re working on it.

This post is not about that.  It’s about what happened afterwards.

There’s a little pocket park not too far away, and my boys and Neighbor Boys wanted to go play.  I said sure.  They’ve gone before, and they all run together in a pack.  I wasn’t worried.

Then the boys came running home telling me that a kid tried to sell them pot.  Not only that, but it’s a kid they know who is in 6th grade at the local middle school.  A 6th grader!  Selling pot!  TO MY BOYS!  Oh no, uh-uh, not my kids.   I got all mother bear and went over there to have words with the kid, but he was already gone.

I’m proud of my boys and Neighbor Boys for doing the right thing.  They said no, left the area, and told an adult, immediately.

The thing is, I never taught them explicitly to do that.  And I don’t think they got it at a DARE class, because I never penciled one into our curriculum.  But you can bet we’re going to start practicing!

I am pretty clear on how I feel about drug use, though. In fact, all last summer I would not allow my boys to play at Neighbor Boys’ house because their brother smoked joints in the garage (he was 16).  I’m glad I held my ground then, because actions speak louder than words and the actions – stay away from that stuff- are what my boys remembered.  Even though at the time?  It was really annoying.

We do have discussions about the bad effects of drugs, especially smoking pot and getting drunk.  I don’t think alcohol is bad, in and of itself, but too much is.  At our house we have a firm policy of no alcohol, though I might have a social drink when out with husband dear.

We live in a nice neighborhood, with big houses and wide sidewalks and family BBQs in the summer.  A sixth grader.   Selling pot on the playground to elementary school kids.

Have your kids had to say no to drugs?

Think It Won’t Happen To You? originally appeared on Mama Says on June 30, 2010. If you see this posted on any other site, please let me know! Leave me a comment on www.milehimama.com

I've got teeth and I know how to use them!

At six months old she could climb to the top of the stairs.

At eight months, she could circumvent any stair blockade we could concoct.  Chairs, pillows, and milkcrates were no match for her.

At nine months, she was walking.  Now she trundles about the house, always so purposeful and so busy.  She’s very laid back, but at the same time has an iron will.  She goes with the flow unless she feels she needs to stand her ground and then there’s no moving her.

She loves her babies and her GlowWorm and hugs them to her chest as she plays.  But she really adores technology.  Anything with buttons and wires attracts her like a moth to candlelight.  She already knows how to take a DVD out of the PS3 and put it in its case.

She loves her nursies.  She nurses to sleep for her morning nap, then tucks her little head under her arm and sleeps sprawled out on my lap.

Her hair is so light and short, she looks bald except for a little puffball tuft at the back of her head.  Yesterday, she weighed 19 pounds and is 27.5 inches tall.  She’s so short, walking all over!

She’s my darling!

One! originally appeared on Mama Says on June 10, 2010. If you see this posted on any other site, please let me know! Leave me a comment on www.milehimama.com

She wasn’t able to view his MRI images on the in-room computer, so she’s going to take a look at the hospital and call me if anything changes.  She doesn’t think the arachnoid cyst is causing Mr P’s headaches, though, which is good news (no surgery!).

She does think he has post concussive syndrome, which can last for months.  She gave a list of supplements and low intervention things to do (such as drink at least 2-3 liters of water per day), and then we’ll keep a headache diary and call in 6 weeks with a follow-up appointment in September.   Mr P told her that his head hurt only a 2 or 3 out of 10, but I don’t think that’s accurate.  He won’t watch TV, play on the computer, read, or even eat much when he has a headache.

After hearing about his symptoms and two trips to the ER last January, she thinks he did have a concussion even though the CT scan looked clear.

Or, it may be migraine headaches, which apparently boys get before puberty sometimes (while girls usually get them after puberty.)

Mr P’s Brain Update originally appeared on Mama Says on June 1, 2010. If you see this posted on any other site, please let me know! Leave me a comment on www.milehimama.com

1.

Tonight is supposed to be Mr. R’s first sleepover ~BUT~ four male family members were down with the stomach bug yesterday and I’m still waiting for the little girls to get it. It hit Mr. S and husband dear pretty hard, and so we have to postpone the party until next week.

2.

Except two boys – friends of his that I’ve never met – haven’t RSVPed so I have no phone number to get ahold of them to tell them that we have to postpone.

Dear Moms. Please RSVP to party invites!

3.

Mr. P finally has his neurology appointment on Tuesday. I hope they’ll be able to see him – through a series of mishaps, mistakes, and a federal holiday I won’t have a current Medicaid card for him (they expire on the last day of the month, and I can’t get one for June until June 1. But his appointment is ON June 1 and I don’t have time to wait a few hours for it before the appt.)

Trying not to be too nervous about it, even though I suspect this is a gatekeeper appointment before getting the rubber stamp to see other specialists or have more testing done.

4.

Salad spinner + 3 year old = happy kitchen helper. And thoroughly dry lettuce.

5.

Drawstring pants + grabby toddler = disaster. And that goes for elastic band skirts when the baby’s learning to pull up, too.

6.

I FINALLY got around to watching the LOST finale. It was so good – until it sucked. SO much left unanswered! What happened to Walt and Michael? And the comic book and the Polar Bear and all the other season 1 mysteries? And why couldn’t anyone have a baby on the island? And what was the DEAL with Ben Linus making Kate dress up all special and have dinner with him? And why did the statue have 4 toes? No explanation of the island, why it was the way it was, why Dharma wanted it so bad, why Widmore needed it? And why did they show hours of footage of people wandering around the church happy? Oh, it wasn’t hours? Just felt like it.

Jin and Sun had the best story, though.

7.

Just read a YA fantasy novel that was great. It’s a Bluebonnet award winner: The Cabinet of Wonders, by Marie Rutkowski.

It’s about a girl, Petra, whose father can work metal magic. He makes tin pets and inventions and makes a special clock for the Prince. The prince repays his work by stealing his eyes (reminiscent of the original Oz series from L. Frank Baum, where the the villainess tries to steal Dorothy’s head).  Petra vows to get them back and ends up doing more than just looking to restore her father’s sight.  Petra has friends, old and new, who can work their own magic including glass inventions and pickpocketing (They aren’t your standard socerer-casting-spell type magicians.)

It’s quite an adventure, and it’s interesting without adult scenes or gory descriptions.  It’s set in Medieval Bohemia, which is a nice change from the usual English style fantasy landscape.

7 Quick Takes vol. 17 originally appeared on Mama Says on May 28, 2010. If you see this posted on any other site, please let me know! Leave me a comment on www.milehimama.com

I needs your help, Internetz.   I have no clue.

Oh, I know about slumber parties – I’ve been to quite a few myself.  We’d giggle, do each other’s hair, paint nails, and read old YMs out loud, then watch a movie and eat pizza.  Later, after midnight, we’d try to scare each other with ghost stories that have since been disproven by Snopes.

Somehow, I don’t think that’s how boy sleepovers go.

Plans so far:

Make your own pizza, make your own ice cream sundae.  Maybe a movie?  Which one?  Help!

Because I Have No Clue originally appeared on Mama Says on May 24, 2010. If you see this posted on any other site, please let me know! Leave me a comment on www.milehimama.com

There was an incident this morning at the bus stop with his wife.

It’s so hard living in this fallen world.

Anyway, I called the school, waiting for R’s teacher to call me back.  And I’ll probably write an email, so that there is a written record.  Poor kids, for a while they were trying to be friends.  They live one house apart, and are in the same class at school.

UPDATE:

I did email the school and speak to the vice prinicipal.  She is aware of issues between the boys, and has never seen bullying towards each other from either side.

AND

Neighbor’s wife came over, apologized for her behavior, and we talked.  She invited R and myself over after school so her son and R can maybe mend fences.  This is wonderful, because I have an inkling that they *could* be friends if their parents would just get out of their way.  I removed this post in the interest of fresh starts and forgiveness.

Perhaps if a rant is too long to tweet, I should give it more time before venting on my blog.  OTOH – my blog is my journal of our life.

But the Bully is the MOM originally appeared on Mama Says on May 13, 2010. If you see this posted on any other site, please let me know! Leave me a comment on www.milehimama.com