Comments on: Little Boy Lost http://www.milehimama.com/faith/little-boy-lost/ Disorganized Discombobulated Devoted ~ a mountain of children, a mountain of chaos, a mountain of fun! Thu, 09 Feb 2012 06:23:58 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.3.1 By: Heather Price http://www.milehimama.com/faith/little-boy-lost/comment-page-1/#comment-3012 Heather Price Thu, 26 Nov 2009 01:38:55 +0000 http://www.milehimama.com/?p=1081#comment-3012 We've touched on this. We had a girl across the street for a while. Girl's mother and stepfather were having troubles, so Mom moved out. She became best friends with my oldest, next one down had a crush on her, etc. She was never a whit of trouble, really, but... Mom and stepdad reconciled enough to get a place together, but when I called a while later, Mom had moved in with another guy. She hasn't called us since, and I "lost" their phone number. I just didn't want to have to explain stepparents, teenage motherhood, Mom's boyfriend, etc. It's been almost two years but they still ask about her. I wonder if God's trying to tell me something. We’ve touched on this. We had a girl across the street for a while. Girl’s mother and stepfather were having troubles, so Mom moved out.
She became best friends with my oldest, next one down had a crush on her, etc. She was never a whit of trouble, really, but…
Mom and stepdad reconciled enough to get a place together, but when I called a while later, Mom had moved in with another guy. She hasn’t called us since, and I “lost” their phone number.

I just didn’t want to have to explain stepparents, teenage motherhood, Mom’s boyfriend, etc.

It’s been almost two years but they still ask about her. I wonder if God’s trying to tell me something.

]]> By: tereza crump AKA MyTreasuredCreations http://www.milehimama.com/faith/little-boy-lost/comment-page-1/#comment-2954 tereza crump AKA MyTreasuredCreations Sun, 22 Nov 2009 15:59:38 +0000 http://www.milehimama.com/?p=1081#comment-2954 Came over from mommylife.net.... I think if God is bugging you with this one, He is probably trying to tell you something. :) It's a tough one though. Pray, ask Him what to do. I would probably talk to my husband and see what he says too. You could probably have him play with your boys under supervision, set the rules, explain why the rules are in play (for your protection, because we love you etc etc) and stay with the boys as they play. Start with a short amount of time. Maybe add something educational to their play time like a bible movie or something else that your kids enjoy doing, so he can have a taste of your live. Serve a snack, take time to talk to him. If at all possible have your husband present, invite his Dad over and the other children. I know, it's a long mile to walk, but Jesus sometimes requires a lot more of us. :) I pray God's wisdom and protection over you and your family. :) Came over from mommylife.net….

I think if God is bugging you with this one, He is probably trying to tell you something. :)

It’s a tough one though. Pray, ask Him what to do. I would probably talk to my husband and see what he says too.

You could probably have him play with your boys under supervision, set the rules, explain why the rules are in play (for your protection, because we love you etc etc) and stay with the boys as they play. Start with a short amount of time. Maybe add something educational to their play time like a bible movie or something else that your kids enjoy doing, so he can have a taste of your live.

Serve a snack, take time to talk to him. If at all possible have your husband present, invite his Dad over and the other children.

I know, it’s a long mile to walk, but Jesus sometimes requires a lot more of us. :)

I pray God’s wisdom and protection over you and your family. :)

]]> By: Mary Hennessey http://www.milehimama.com/faith/little-boy-lost/comment-page-1/#comment-2900 Mary Hennessey Wed, 18 Nov 2009 20:18:02 +0000 http://www.milehimama.com/?p=1081#comment-2900 Setting limits is essential, but God does call us to works of mercy and sometimes they don't happen on our timetable. Listening to God all the time, through all circumstances in our lives is what we all should be doing. (I talk a good talk, but the walk isn't so easy for me). Setting limits is essential, but God does call us to works of mercy and sometimes they don’t happen on our timetable. Listening to God all the time, through all circumstances in our lives is what we all should be doing. (I talk a good talk, but the walk isn’t so easy for me).

]]> By: Susan http://www.milehimama.com/faith/little-boy-lost/comment-page-1/#comment-2897 Susan Wed, 18 Nov 2009 15:48:13 +0000 http://www.milehimama.com/?p=1081#comment-2897 I agree with Alexandra - set out clear rules and boundaries and time limits. If they break the rules then they're banned for a certain predetermined amount of time. Perhaps if they follow the rules, the times they are allowed to visit can be expanded. I agree with Alexandra – set out clear rules and boundaries and time limits. If they break the rules then they’re banned for a certain predetermined amount of time. Perhaps if they follow the rules, the times they are allowed to visit can be expanded.

]]> By: Alexandra http://www.milehimama.com/faith/little-boy-lost/comment-page-1/#comment-2886 Alexandra Wed, 18 Nov 2009 04:45:54 +0000 http://www.milehimama.com/?p=1081#comment-2886 I was thinking the same thing as I got to the end of your post. I think it's worth a try to have them visit under supervision for a limited time(say an hour - use a timer). Maybe set some clear boundaries with them. Write up some house rules, post them, and point them out to the boys. They can stay if they abide by them. I was thinking the same thing as I got to the end of your post. I think it’s worth a try to have them visit under supervision for a limited time(say an hour – use a timer). Maybe set some clear boundaries with them. Write up some house rules, post them, and point them out to the boys. They can stay if they abide by them.

]]> By: Gae http://www.milehimama.com/faith/little-boy-lost/comment-page-1/#comment-2884 Gae Tue, 17 Nov 2009 23:42:53 +0000 http://www.milehimama.com/?p=1081#comment-2884 Wow this is a hard one to decide and one that I think you will have to make choices on a day to day basis based on each day. Some days might be harder due to your own personal circumstances. However it is easy to say when not being the peron who is in the situation. I am like you though I think how sad it is they have not Mummy. So very very hard for them Prayer is where I would go and let that guide you on this one. God Bless Wow this is a hard one to decide and one that I think you will have to make choices on a day to day basis based on each day.
Some days might be harder due to your own personal circumstances.
However it is easy to say when not being the peron who is in the situation.
I am like you though I think how sad it is they have not Mummy. So very very hard for them
Prayer is where I would go and let that guide you on this one.
God Bless

]]> By: Milehimama http://www.milehimama.com/faith/little-boy-lost/comment-page-1/#comment-2883 Milehimama Tue, 17 Nov 2009 23:35:17 +0000 http://www.milehimama.com/?p=1081#comment-2883 It is a hard call. It also brings up uncomfortable self-contemplation - how much is their naughtiness, vs. MY wanting to be left alone, not have to watch every minute, not be inconvenienced? It is a hard call. It also brings up uncomfortable self-contemplation – how much is their naughtiness, vs. MY wanting to be left alone, not have to watch every minute, not be inconvenienced?

]]> By: Mary Hennessey http://www.milehimama.com/faith/little-boy-lost/comment-page-1/#comment-2882 Mary Hennessey Tue, 17 Nov 2009 22:40:15 +0000 http://www.milehimama.com/?p=1081#comment-2882 I would have invited them in (with supervision). When I see someone like that, I know they are starved for attention. When I show them hospitality in the name of the Lord, God can change them. You can bet I set ground rules regarding language, topics of discussion, etc. But I can influence a soul this way. We have ended up taking 4 extra children to Sunday Mass each week. They weren't getting the teaching in the home, but they knew where they could come for spiritual help. I got the idea when I friend I met in our adult Bible study said she converted to Catholicism because her friend's mom invited her in and took her to church as a child. I would have invited them in (with supervision). When I see someone like that, I know they are starved for attention. When I show them hospitality in the name of the Lord, God can change them. You can bet I set ground rules regarding language, topics of discussion, etc. But I can influence a soul this way. We have ended up taking 4 extra children to Sunday Mass each week. They weren’t getting the teaching in the home, but they knew where they could come for spiritual help. I got the idea when I friend I met in our adult Bible study said she converted to Catholicism because her friend’s mom invited her in and took her to church as a child.

]]> By: Nadja http://www.milehimama.com/faith/little-boy-lost/comment-page-1/#comment-2881 Nadja Tue, 17 Nov 2009 22:20:19 +0000 http://www.milehimama.com/?p=1081#comment-2881 This is such a tough one. I had a similar situation with some kids who lived nearby. They were rough kids, watched everything on TV, played violent video games and I noted that when they came by, my own boys always seemed to be, um, less well-behaved afterward. There was bad language and rudeness, and I had to set some rules. The boys decided that the rules made it no fun to play over here, and so we saw no more of them. I was relieved when they moved. But part of me said that I should have had them in the house, where I could monitor things--I just couldn't bear the chaos (my kids are loud and crazy enough without the company!) In the end, I can't be charitable at the expense of my kids' innocence. They will learn things in time that I don't want them to, but not through my doing. I wouldn't expose myself to a contagious disease out of charity either, as I have to protect my family. Still, it is a tough call. This is such a tough one. I had a similar situation with some kids who lived nearby. They were rough kids, watched everything on TV, played violent video games and I noted that when they came by, my own boys always seemed to be, um, less well-behaved afterward. There was bad language and rudeness, and I had to set some rules. The boys decided that the rules made it no fun to play over here, and so we saw no more of them. I was relieved when they moved.

But part of me said that I should have had them in the house, where I could monitor things–I just couldn’t bear the chaos (my kids are loud and crazy enough without the company!)

In the end, I can’t be charitable at the expense of my kids’ innocence. They will learn things in time that I don’t want them to, but not through my doing. I wouldn’t expose myself to a contagious disease out of charity either, as I have to protect my family.

Still, it is a tough call.

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